This post is for anyone who can’t stand Christmas—men, women, trans, nonbinary, however you identify. If the holidays make you feel more overwhelmed than joyful, welcome. You’re in the right place.
I might sound like the Grinch, but honestly? Christmas is just another Thursday for me.
I woke up with no Christmas tree. No wrapped presents. No magical morning for my kids. I didn’t receive a gift either. And while I’d love to say that didn’t sting, it did—just a little. Not in a dramatic, movie-scene way. More in a quiet, “this is my reality right now” kind of way.
I’ve always been the black sheep or the family disappointment—you know the role. In the past, family members would usually send money around the holidays because, let’s be real, I almost always need it. But this year, after all the help I received earlier, there wasn’t much left to give.
That said, I want to shout out:
- The family member who sent me $25, which was just enough for diapers and wipes
- Another who gifted me sweatsuits, which is basically my official uniform at this stage of life
And honestly? I’m grateful. Survival gifts count.
When Holiday Depression Hits Hard
If you’re dealing with holiday depression, anxiety, or other mental health struggles during Christmas, I want you to know something:
You are not broken. And you are not alone.
This holiday is held to such a high standard by society—everyone is supposed to be happy, dressed in red and green, smiling with perfectly decorated trees behind them. But life doesn’t magically pause its problems just because it’s December 25th.
The world doesn’t stop being chaotic.
Bills don’t disappear.
Trauma doesn’t take the day off.
Mental health struggles don’t reschedule.
So if you’re home today doing what you do any other day—scrolling, surviving, existing—I’m right there with you.
Faith, Flaws, and Still Being Loved
I do have a relationship with the Lord. I believe in Jesus Christ. And no, my behavior doesn’t always reflect that. I’ve fallen back into habits I’m not proud of—but that’s something God and I are working through together.
And if you don’t share my faith, that’s okay too. You’re still loved. Truly.
Grace isn’t canceled because you’re struggling.
Love doesn’t disappear because you’re tired.
Hope doesn’t expire because you’re human.
For the Kids the World Forgets
This part matters deeply to me.
To the kids who woke up today with:
- No electricity
- No food
- No presents
- No Christmas tree
- Or no understanding of what Christmas even is
I pray that your light doesn’t go out.
I pray you keep that spark in your eye.
I pray you keep fighting for your dreams.
I pray you make it out of the situation you were born into—even though none of it was your fault.
Every child deserves a chance at happiness.
Not perfection. Just a chance.
To the Kids in Hospitals and Families Hurting
To the children spending Christmas in hospitals, and to the families sitting beside them—I love you. I pray for healing, stability, resources, and peace. Every child deserves safety, health, and a loving environment, no matter where they were born or to whom.
Adults’ decisions should not be the weight children carry—but too often, they are.
Joy Can Coexist With Grief
To the high-spirited, joy-filled people posting matching pajamas and sparkling trees—I promise, I’m not trying to bring you down. I live through you sometimes. Truly.
I pray one day I can give my kids that experience: waking up to a tree, presents everywhere, laughter filling the room. But I also know that isn’t reality for everyone—and pretending it is can hurt those of us still trying to survive.
Right now, my reality looks like debt, depression, and intrusive thoughts. I’m struggling badly with my mental health this holiday season. I won’t sugarcoat that.
But I’m still here.
I’m still fighting.
And I know I’m not the only one.
Keep Going—Even If It’s Just One More Day
Sometimes it feels impossible to imagine getting everything you need before something else goes wrong. Like every step forward comes with another setback. If you feel stuck, behind, or exhausted by life—you’re not weak. You’re human.
Maybe we need to stop pretending Christmas fixes everything.
Maybe we need to admit that sometimes…
Christmas is just a Thursday.
And that’s okay.
If you’re reading this today, keep pushing. Keep fighting. Even if all you can do is breathe and make it to tomorrow—that still counts.
I’m with you.
I love you.
And you matter more than the holiday ever will. 🤍
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